Tomato Soup

I love Progresso hearty tomato soup. I LOVE it. I could eat it daily (sometimes I do). I think everyone should try it. Sometimes I like to slice some colby jack cheese into it and also throw some seasoned croutons in for crunch.

I just wanted to tell everyone that.

What do you love to eat?

Words I've Liked This Week

Colluding: I just learned this word today. It means, "to act together in a secret understanding." I am obsessed with the whole Casey Anthony case and have been watching updates via Nancy Grace on YouTube every day, and today her guest psychoanalyst Bethany Marshall (who is my favorite of all her psychoanalysts) used this word several times. I LOVE to learn new words.

Elaborate: Bethany Marshall also used this word today, and I realized that I think it is a fantastic word. (I think I like Bethany Marshall partly because she uses fantastic words.)

Redundant: My friend Claire used this in a blog she wrote ages ago, and when I read it, I realized that I just like the sound of it. Now whenever I think about pleasant-sounding words, I want to say it, which is probably ironic because its meaning is not necessarily pleasant.

Fabulous: It struck me this week that when I use the word fabulous, I automatically feel more confident.

Incidentally: I love this word. It is so appropriate to use in conversations whenever you have an aside. And incidentally, I'm pretty sure I over-use it.

Nimrod: One of my fellow etsy artisans used it today, and it made me laugh. My brother used to use this word all the time, so it is froth with memories. (Incidentally, her shop is www.madhatterspottery.etsy.com, and she makes beautiful pottery with candles.) :-)

What words do you like this week?

How I Discovered My Fascination with Doll Clothes

I am enamored with a web store that sells doll clothes. I know… it’s strange. I don’t have a doll. I don’t have a daughter. I don’t even dress my dog in people clothes! There is no reason for me to be enamored with doll clothes, yet I have been completely taken in since the moment I happened upon this store.

Before I say anything else about this, I should introduce you to the store. It’s www.dollcloset.etsy.com. You MUST click on it. Aren’t they AMAZING? I LOVE these clothes. I love them so much that, realizing that the absence of a doll, a daughter, or even a dog with people clothes makes it a bit strange to buy these treasures, I started forwarding the link. I forwarded it to Cathy, who I work with and who loves American Girl dolls. I forwarded it to my mother, who has three granddaughters. I forwarded it to my sister-in-law, who birthed two of my mother’s granddaughters and to my cousin, who birthed the other one. I felt it was absolutely NECESSARY that SOMEBODY else see the intrinsic value in this store AND that that somebody would be somebody who could do something about it!

Then I sat at my computer agonizing (because that is what I do with unresolved situations, even when they are minute – I agonize), thinking that there had to be MORE people to tell about this, MORE people to drive business to this woman’s store so that she would do well and continue to make these amazing clothes, and I could continue to be enamored. These doll clothes stirred so much longing in me that I even considered buying my own doll – I kid you not. Then somewhere, in the midst of my agonizing, the obvious question hit me:

So… uh… considering that you don’t have a doll or a daughter and that you refuse to dress Dora in people clothes, WHY are you enamored with doll clothes?

Good question.

It is so good, in fact, that I have spent several days considering it. It isn’t because I want a doll. (I have never in my adult life considered getting a doll until I saw this store.) It isn’t because I want a daughter. (I’m sure I’d love a daughter like crazy if I had one, but I am very happy right now and genuinely don’t feel that empty ache of childlessness.) It isn’t because my grandmother made me clothes for my cabbage patch dolls when I was a child. (She did do that, and I absolutely loved them, but she and I weren’t very close.) It isn’t because… well, you get the picture. So have my considerations gone until finally the answer hit me. Do you want to know why it is? Of course you do! It’s because I like changing dolls’ clothes, and I always have.

I think that when I look at this adorable shop and see these adorable clothes, I have this weird longing to dress a doll so that I can live vicariously through it. No, stick with me; this really does make sense! You see, I never feel put together. My house is never clean. My clothes are never ironed. I don’t blow dry or curl my hair. I don’t paint my nails or put on make-up most of the time. And as much as I try to come off as a natural hippie girl, I don’t think that is really the deepest reason for any of this. I think the deepest reason is that I just don’t feel like I can put things together well.

My cousin Bek has three children that she homeschools plus she runs a business out of her home, and at any random moment you could lick the floor in her house without so much as getting a smidgen of dust on your tongue. I don’t understand that. I can spend an entire half hour on one square of tile, and it still isn’t clean! My friend Cheryl has a wonderful knack for looking fresh. Her hair, her make-up, and her clothes are always impeccable; I’ve never seen her looking “off.” I don’t understand that, either. I feel fortunate lately if I can find a matching outfit that is actually laundered! And it isn’t that my house has never been clean or that I’ve never looked cute; it’s just that those things seem to take so much effort and energy for me – sort of like being on time, getting through my to-do list, getting the recycling out on the right night…

But oh… give me a doll, five minutes, and a cute outfit from Doll Closet, and you will see a cutie ready for a picnic at the park… or an angel waiting for her bedtime story and a glass of milk… or an excited mind anticipating a wonderful day of learning… or my personal favorite: an at-ease life looking forward to a really good time with the people she loves. Give me a doll, five minutes, and a cute outfit from Doll Closet, and for a moment, I will feel that it is okay to not be put together because something else IS, and in that moment, that will be enough.

(Incidentally, I think the parts of Christianity that really appeal to me appeal to me for the same reasons that this shop appeals to me. It calls to the parts of me that feel consistently not put together. It tells me it’s okay. It tells me that Someone else IS put together, and it tells me that that is enough.)

Profanity

profane: adj.; marked by contempt or irreverence for what is sacred

We live in a world where not much is special. I started thinking about this today because I got an email forward entitled “Sights You May Not See in a Lifetime,” and it contained pictures of things like a killer whale nosing up to a boat where a dog was looking over the side, a leopard sitting on top of a woman’s car, an African man lying beside a baby elephant inside of a tent… I don’t know if any of these pictures were photoshopped, but I do know that I scrolled down quickly, not taking the time to look at any of them with wonder. I didn’t need to. After all, if I decide that I want to see an African man lying beside a baby elephant inside of a tent, all I have to do is find that email and scroll to that picture. And if I erase the email, a few keystrokes and clicks on Google should do the trick. The same thing is true of falling stars, rainbows, woodpeckers, romance… a click on the Internet, a drive to Blockbuster, or a subscription to National Geographic can completely alleviate my imagination’s longing to stand in awe and to wonder. I have access to everything, and that can make the most sacred things profane. But I don’t want to shut down that part of myself.

When everything is accessible, it’s hard to find anything sacred. Profanity is prevalent.

My point is not to rip on wealth or technology. My point is to acknowledge my need to intentionally separate the shadows from what they represent, to make myself stop when I see sacred things, to allow myself to have my breath taken away and my mind cleared of the schedule it tries so hard to keep. I have a fantastic picture of Manuel Antonio National Park on my computer, but it doesn’t come close to capturing the actual beauty I have seen there. I love books and movies like The Scarlet Pimpernel and Ever After and The Sound of Music, but they can never compare to the actual beauty, agony, and mystery of my real-life love, if I will just take the time to be aware of it. I have access to endless stories of courage and truth that give me goose-bumps because they’re so grand, but they are nothing compared to the actual feelings I have (good and bad) when I am faced with a choice that requires courage or truth. I don’t want to live life in these shadows. I want to be at the place where they don’t satisfy me but where they do just the opposite: awaken in me longings for real things – real beauty, real romance, and real life.

I would like profanity to slowly seep out of my life. I would like to find the wonder that my world has never much encouraged me to have. I would like to be taken in by raindrops and ladybugs and hugs, and I would like to live in that kind of sacredness every day.